Ideal Home Life - online book

A valuable and well-organized system for home education(homeschooling) 3 to 12 years.

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AMUSEMENTS FOR EVERYBODY               97
What is the difference between a young lady and a mouse? One charms the he's, the other harms the cheese.
What is the difference between a gardener and a Chinaman ? One keeps the lawn wet, the other keeps the lawn dry (laundry).
Why is a man who makes pens a wicked man? Because he makes men steel (steal) pens and then says they do write (right).
Who is the greatest chicken-killer spoken of in Shakespeare ? Macbeth, because he did murder most foul.
Spell " Adam's Express Company " with three letters. E-v-e.
What three great writers' names might you think of if you were watching a house burn down? Dickens, Howitt, Burns.
If you were invited out to dinner and on sitting down to the table saw nothing but a beet, what would you say ? " That beet's all."
When is charity like a top ? When it begins to hum.
Why is a man sometimes like dough ? Not because a woman needs (kneads) him, but because he is hard to get off of her hands.
At what time of day was Adam created? A little before Eve.
If a bear were to go into a dry goods store, what would he want? He would want muzzlin'.
Why is B like a hot fire ? Because it makes oil Boil.
Why was the first day of Adam's life the longest? Because it had no Eve.
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