WILLIAM THE SHOWMAN 109
an' give half to Mr. Peters for his Socity to let us play in his shrubbery. Don't you all think so ? "
" Oh yes," said Douglas sarcastically, " let's give 'em half. Half of nothin's nothin'. Let's give 'em nothin'. If you think anyone's goin' to pay money— well, think of all the other things we've done, that's all. When 've we ever made any money ? "
" Oh, shut up ! " said William wearily, "we never should for all you do to help, that's cert'nly true. Why, I tell you we've never done a waxwork show before. I bet we'll make heaps of money with a waxwork show."
" Well, what'd we have to do ? "
" Oh, jus' dress up as people, that's all. People in history. Then I'll make a speech about you an' say you're made of wax. An' you've not gotter do anythin' but jus' stand starin' in front of you an' not movin'. It's quite easy; you jus' stand starin' in front of you and not movin' an' they jus' pay money an' look at you."
" What history people ? " said Ginger.
" Oh, any," said William carelessly.
" We haven't got any history people's clothes," objected Douglas.
" Haven't you got any sense ? " said William irritably. " Cert'nly to hear you talk anyone 'd think you hadn't. Anyone can make up history people's clothes. History people jus' wore tablecloths and long stockings an' funny things on their heads. Anyone c'n get those. You can make crowns out of cardboard for kings, an' other people wore waste-paper baskets or—well, p'raps not saucepans," ended William thoughtfully, remembering an occasion when a saucepan had slipped down over his head during his rendering of a dramatic part in a play and refused to be removed. " No—p'raps jus' waste-paper baskets an' crowns made of cardboard. An' we'll put on beards an' whiskers an' things with cork an' then we'll .look jus' like history people."