Original Illustrated Version By Mark Twain

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gait was the hop-skip-and-jump—proof enough that his heart was light and his anticipations high. He was eating an apple, and giving a long, melodious whoop, at intervals, followed by a deep-toned ding-dong-dong, ding-dong-dong, for he was personating a steamboat. As he drew near, he slackened speed, took the middle of the street, leaned far over to starboard and rounded to ponderously and with laborious pomp and circumstance—for he was personating the " Big Missouri," and considered himself to be drawing nine feet of water. He was boat, and captain, and engine-bells combined, so he had to imagine himself standing on his own hurricane-deck giving the orders and executing them:
"Stop her, sir! Ting-a-ling-ling !" The headway ran almost out and he drew up slowly toward the side-walk.
"Ship up to back! Ting-a-ling-ling!" His arms straightened and stiffened down his sides.
"Set her back on the stabboard! Ting-a-ling-ling! Chow! ch-chow-wow ! Chow! " His right hand, meantime, describing stately circles,—for it was representing a forty-foot wheel.
" Let her go back on the labboard ! Ting-a-ling-ling ! . Chow-ch-chow-chow! " The left hand began to describe circles.
" Stop the stabboard ! Ting-a-ling-ling ! Stop the labbord ! Come ahead on the stabboard ! Stop her! Let your outside turn over slow! Ting-a-ling-ling! Chow-ow-ow ! Get out that head-line! Lively now! Come—out with your spring-line—what're you about there! Take a turn round that stump with the bight of it! Standby that stage, now—let her go! Done with the engines, sir! Ting-a-ling-ling ! Sh't! Sh't! Sh't!! " (trying the gauge-cocks.)
Tom went on whitewashing—paid no attention to the steamboat. Ben stared a moment and then said :
" Hi-yi! You re up a stump, ain't you ! "
No answer. Tom surveyed his last touch with the eye of an artist; then he gave his brush another gentle sweep and surveyed the result, as before. Ben ranged up alongside of him. Tom's mouth watered for the apple, but he stuck to his work. Ben said:
" Hello, old chap, you got to work, hey ? "
Tom wheeled suddenly and said: